kristy
feexa
liz
sakeena
khairin
hanah
shid
tea
lynn
rfandi
azri
liyana
nad
shuqing
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when unlike poles repel and mr maslow was all wrong 20081228
when you cant even afford to make your sister happy wif a 9.90 pencil case, it sucks BIG time.
when you cant even afford to treat ur mummy n sisters wif a tad above 5 per meal, the feeling that shrouded me was just something tt deserved to be chugged down so deep in the gutter.
when ur sister gave up on that 9.90 pencil case and went abt her luck wif a 4.90 one, and her hopes went flat...tt sucks as BIG, if not mega mighty BIGGER.
at this note, i could already hear most of you mouthing what a mega loser ive been, cannot even afford a 4.90 pencil case..
why tis world just love basking in the riches of life, that you have to put a value to everything?
my sister wasnt the centre of pandemonium when she didnt get her pencil case at the mall bt tt face she gave me was that of how my love for her might have been devalued when i cant even place a worthy price tag of 4.90?
for an eldest sibling, tts enuff to squeeze me in a wring of guilt.
thanks to this superficial world that has made a poor girl like me feel much so upset even abt things like tis..or maybe i just think a wee bit too much?
go figure. it must be maslow's hierarchy of needs theory.
tts when all the pieces fit ever so perfectly.
i shall give a breakdown of this ever popular theory of all time.
This theory states that humans have five basic needs :psychology, safety, love/belonging, esteem and self-actualization. These needs are arranged in a hierarchy where the higher needs come into focus when lower needs are satisfied.
Maslow's theory intuitively makes sense in general, aint it?
BUT, I personally think it is an ill-conceived concept that limits people in their struggle to live fullfilled lives the way it is. The notion of happiness is encapsulated in satisfying needs. In reality people overestimate the impact of satisfying a need. Like how wanting to buy that pencil case bt just cant ..can make me feel so down cos I feel its a need to never let ur sisters down. And you want to satisfy that need so bad that it makes you feel all battered. hah a bit too overblown there bt hell, you get it.
I think that the struggle of satisfying needs and avoiding pain is a major source of unhappiness in our society today. It is time we eradicate Maslow's theory.
till i get her that pencil case, i noe she'll be dropping pinsized hints.
i'll get for her alrite, when im not so financially challenged.
that's that. lets detach..
mum is doin her equipose of banishing my dad to the outer reaches and dropping her voice to the lowest register in instances like when she told me to: 'cook for your dad as well' (tis means that she hadnt ignored him completely). shes the hallmark of theatrical genius i tell ya. drama mama..
and my dad..hes been staring into that lifeless square wif strings of numbers so long and graphs much that i swear i wun wana see numbers and plunging and skyscraping graphs for the next decade if i were him. what made him think that this robotic square box could promise him the life he wishes for all of us through such lifelessness of that machine, im yet to find out.
or maybe i shudnt even bother, cos if i do i might just derail his/her life. its that bad.
they have been goin on like tis on and off since...not the faintest idea.
oh well, i grant them that merci.
ive been ms tolerant that long.
maybe tis way my life will hold more shades of colours...more drama. woots!
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close your mouth mr hippotamus 20081211
The past 4 hrs or so was the last day of Hari Raya Haji. But not the last of sacrifices that have to be made by humankind for the betterment of others and oneself. Like the words of Hellen Keller, "Many persons have the wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose".
This world sure is a fast dizzying game - a roller coaster, throwing you terrified of every sharp bends, but while the journey lasts, you will soak in the moment; soaking wif excitement; wanting to get to the top of urself and just scream like a banshee with a mirror flashed in the face.
Without knowing or feigning to not know, your neighbours for the ride could have had their ears defunct or racked and misshapened their eardrums, leaving them deftone for their entire livedom.
Cant point fingers at roller coasters to be the objects of blame, they are not the 'deaf'-endents here. My point was, you cant just brush off everything in ur path to get what you want, to get to the peak of ur life literally by deafening others around you.
You get the thrill you wanted, let out ur griefs and woes as you scream at the top of ur ribcages but at the 'deaf' of others.
Why deafening others on a roller coaster ride should even be blown out of proportion you say?
Then just consider how sacrificing dun even bat the eyelashes of people or wince at the thought of it among all else capital.
It seems trivial at first but oh-so-not.
Cos all those plaintiffs will press charges for them not being able to differentiate between a 'do' and a 're'. Would have been oh-not-trivial-at-all if the rest of the roller coaster was filled with budding musicians cept you.
Therefore this universe does not orbit around you alone. All decisions and actions gravitate upon others, sending them hilter-skilter and off-tangent if you dun weigh the zone of indifference. Life is like breaths drawn from others, like sharing that cycle of air - the carbon cycle or what not...interdependent and intertwined with the lives of others.
Its like mountaineering, refusing to help the slower ones which brings nothing but impeding the whole expedition team as they lag and stall.
Hereby sacrifice renders itself to the universe making sense all over again, the one link that fills the spaces between beings of no blood ties; adjoining souls defining the world to not only be plagued by unjustifiable and insatiable human wants. Sacrifice is about not being naked just for clothing but naked for dignity and respect; homeless not for bricks and rooftops but homeless cos of rejection when you lost that dignity. Dignity that is inequitable to capital.
Sacrifice in its whole true entirety is submission and not surrender.
It should be one that is sincere and not something to be articulated to drown and dissolve the suppress of bad karma at the back of your throat or milk the good retribution or prolly to jump the queue to heaven (in Sin-cha-por terms : must sac-ri-fy, if not you go hell ley), im not talking about offerings of sacrifices here, just sacrifice standalone; like how you would define "I sacrificed my job so that i could look after my kids".
Tho theres only a fine line separating submission and surrender.
So, maybe the next time you are on a roller coaster ride, try to reduce your screamings and squealings. Sacrifice your fear for heights or your need for cheap thrill of screaming decibels at ultimatum height if you are sure you cant close ur mouths. Cos seriously i had my fair share of saliva in ur mouth already.
Supa dupa gross.
God noes what species of bacterium thrived in that splat of saliva on my arm that day.
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buying youth? 20081207
Baked a storm on Thursday. Heh, not exactly a storm but sugee cookies and a rainbow marble cake for Hari Raya Haji. Weeepeeedeeedokadoiingz! ;)
Sugee cookies
Rainbow marble cake : this i made in collaboration wif my mum
That will be all there is to my Hari Raya Haji, wif the customary chaperons; maybe chicken kurma or chicken rendang and briyani. Tho theres nothing much really other than the savours, still that makes me a jubilant one :)
This next installment will spell of how unscrupulous shenanigans can wring your biggy big pockets dry out of the downtrodden, literally.
Application form read : We will be responsible for looking for clients for our
models.
Guy : Btw, we are different from those agencies in HDB who are
more often than not are in desperate need for models, thus, they will scout desperately for models without any projects at hand. For us, we liaise wif considerably large corporations who will book us for projects and then scout for new faces or take on available existing models.
Me to myself : Ahuhh. So much for calling other agencies desperate. Urs aint any better. What was all the "Our agency is looking for faces to be in Singtel's upcoming commercial" about when nothin bt it was even mentioned during the introductory rite of theirs or watevr. Reeks of desperado mucho to moi, using that tactic as a booby trap.
And here i am foolhardy to think that they picked us out of simple random selection on that morning at fine and dandy orchard rd and i'll get to be one of those everyday faces in a colossal montage of Singaporeans who subscribe to Singtel (tho ironically im not) as concession to a less soporific holiday.
From this holiday so dreary that i could just peel my skin ( u noe skin that gets soaked in water and swells a whitish fold, oooh i love to peel em') sore and dry, like plucking fur off a Persian cat?
So dreary that i could just walk the length of Orchard Road wif a getup which looked like i just rammed into a Roman candle. LOL check out this linkie kali babas : http://www.asylum.com/gallery/the-weirdest-victorias-secret-outfits-we-found/521620/
and count all those whose heads spin wif jawgaping disbelief. Yea im highstrung. Hah.
Guy : you noe both of you have one thing in common. u noe wat?
me and fren : err. No.
Guy : You are both young. Clients prefer young faces. So after all that, dun u want to noe how much u'll have to pay for the portfolio? (there were other bouts he was tellin us bt they just trailed off into a lull voice in my cerebral at tt point)
me and fren : *we gave the wth look at each other*
fren : so.....what now we have to pay this lump sum of 680 for 5 outfits photography like now itself?...
Guy : you may bt i understand ur students and wun be able to pay now but u can cash in deposit or alternatively u can pay the full amt another day bt im afraid by then our ready clients will not be looking for models anymore.
me : * here- he- goes-yada-yada-subdued interest look*
Guy : you can also look at 3 outfits which will go at 480 buckeroos.
fren : ok watevr it is i can only confirm in 2 wks time
me : for me tt amount will only be attainable like by end jan 2009? (in my hart, yae as if, you can bid ur 480 buckeroos bon voyage...rather splurge it on an ipod)
soon, we treaded out of the agency.
The punchline is anyone can be models these days esp wif those bulging faux leather wallets to boot. This industry in Singapore as i see it is deluded. U dun pay 480 buckeroos to clinch a bank job do you? so why does tis has to be any different? Just for tt effing portfolio that they will do up nice nice sui sui for you. Little tt u noe u might look worse than you already are. what if they make you look like this mentel gundu here? HAHA
or even if you dont, what are the odds of even appearing as endearing to these clients so that they will partake you for their projects? and get future projects? you wouldnt wana stop at one.
If thats the case, forking 480 as investment (as the guy puts it) will make for loss on our side. Its not like i blardy care but wat abt those passionate and hard-up for modeling?
I mean cant these people just cover the costs of creating our portfolios and then just reap their due and deserved amt from the projects itself? Since its ur responsibility to find clients for every face then it shudnt be a problem for them to keep projects and moolah coming rite? As in it will be of duty for them to find the means possible in their stride to keep them coming? As of now watever this agency and all those in the cahoots are doing seem like they are just falling on the game of heads-and-tail of which of those whose entrance will send blue and orange notes whizzing in their faces. just my fifteen cents worth not trying to rough people up the wrong way but blogging is just the economy of speaking my mind for me :) PEACE.
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<$BlogDateHeader$>
when you cant even afford to make your sister happy wif a 9.90 pencil case, it sucks BIG time.
when you cant even afford to treat ur mummy n sisters wif a tad above 5 per meal, the feeling that shrouded me was just something tt deserved to be chugged down so deep in the gutter.
when ur sister gave up on that 9.90 pencil case and went abt her luck wif a 4.90 one, and her hopes went flat...tt sucks as BIG, if not mega mighty BIGGER.
at this note, i could already hear most of you mouthing what a mega loser ive been, cannot even afford a 4.90 pencil case..
why tis world just love basking in the riches of life, that you have to put a value to everything?
my sister wasnt the centre of pandemonium when she didnt get her pencil case at the mall bt tt face she gave me was that of how my love for her might have been devalued when i cant even place a worthy price tag of 4.90?
for an eldest sibling, tts enuff to squeeze me in a wring of guilt.
thanks to this superficial world that has made a poor girl like me feel much so upset even abt things like tis..or maybe i just think a wee bit too much?
go figure. it must be maslow's hierarchy of needs theory.
tts when all the pieces fit ever so perfectly.
i shall give a breakdown of this ever popular theory of all time.
This theory states that humans have five basic needs :psychology, safety, love/belonging, esteem and self-actualization. These needs are arranged in a hierarchy where the higher needs come into focus when lower needs are satisfied.
Maslow's theory intuitively makes sense in general, aint it?
BUT, I personally think it is an ill-conceived concept that limits people in their struggle to live fullfilled lives the way it is. The notion of happiness is encapsulated in satisfying needs. In reality people overestimate the impact of satisfying a need. Like how wanting to buy that pencil case bt just cant ..can make me feel so down cos I feel its a need to never let ur sisters down. And you want to satisfy that need so bad that it makes you feel all battered. hah a bit too overblown there bt hell, you get it.
I think that the struggle of satisfying needs and avoiding pain is a major source of unhappiness in our society today. It is time we eradicate Maslow's theory.
till i get her that pencil case, i noe she'll be dropping pinsized hints.
i'll get for her alrite, when im not so financially challenged.
that's that. lets detach..
mum is doin her equipose of banishing my dad to the outer reaches and dropping her voice to the lowest register in instances like when she told me to: 'cook for your dad as well' (tis means that she hadnt ignored him completely). shes the hallmark of theatrical genius i tell ya. drama mama..
and my dad..hes been staring into that lifeless square wif strings of numbers so long and graphs much that i swear i wun wana see numbers and plunging and skyscraping graphs for the next decade if i were him. what made him think that this robotic square box could promise him the life he wishes for all of us through such lifelessness of that machine, im yet to find out.
or maybe i shudnt even bother, cos if i do i might just derail his/her life. its that bad.
they have been goin on like tis on and off since...not the faintest idea.
oh well, i grant them that merci.
ive been ms tolerant that long.
maybe tis way my life will hold more shades of colours...more drama. woots!
|
|
<$BlogDateHeader$>
The past 4 hrs or so was the last day of Hari Raya Haji. But not the last of sacrifices that have to be made by humankind for the betterment of others and oneself. Like the words of Hellen Keller, "Many persons have the wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose".
This world sure is a fast dizzying game - a roller coaster, throwing you terrified of every sharp bends, but while the journey lasts, you will soak in the moment; soaking wif excitement; wanting to get to the top of urself and just scream like a banshee with a mirror flashed in the face.
Without knowing or feigning to not know, your neighbours for the ride could have had their ears defunct or racked and misshapened their eardrums, leaving them deftone for their entire livedom.
Cant point fingers at roller coasters to be the objects of blame, they are not the 'deaf'-endents here. My point was, you cant just brush off everything in ur path to get what you want, to get to the peak of ur life literally by deafening others around you.
You get the thrill you wanted, let out ur griefs and woes as you scream at the top of ur ribcages but at the 'deaf' of others.
Why deafening others on a roller coaster ride should even be blown out of proportion you say?
Then just consider how sacrificing dun even bat the eyelashes of people or wince at the thought of it among all else capital.
It seems trivial at first but oh-so-not.
Cos all those plaintiffs will press charges for them not being able to differentiate between a 'do' and a 're'. Would have been oh-not-trivial-at-all if the rest of the roller coaster was filled with budding musicians cept you.
Therefore this universe does not orbit around you alone. All decisions and actions gravitate upon others, sending them hilter-skilter and off-tangent if you dun weigh the zone of indifference. Life is like breaths drawn from others, like sharing that cycle of air - the carbon cycle or what not...interdependent and intertwined with the lives of others.
Its like mountaineering, refusing to help the slower ones which brings nothing but impeding the whole expedition team as they lag and stall.
Hereby sacrifice renders itself to the universe making sense all over again, the one link that fills the spaces between beings of no blood ties; adjoining souls defining the world to not only be plagued by unjustifiable and insatiable human wants. Sacrifice is about not being naked just for clothing but naked for dignity and respect; homeless not for bricks and rooftops but homeless cos of rejection when you lost that dignity. Dignity that is inequitable to capital.
Sacrifice in its whole true entirety is submission and not surrender.
It should be one that is sincere and not something to be articulated to drown and dissolve the suppress of bad karma at the back of your throat or milk the good retribution or prolly to jump the queue to heaven (in Sin-cha-por terms : must sac-ri-fy, if not you go hell ley), im not talking about offerings of sacrifices here, just sacrifice standalone; like how you would define "I sacrificed my job so that i could look after my kids".
Tho theres only a fine line separating submission and surrender.
So, maybe the next time you are on a roller coaster ride, try to reduce your screamings and squealings. Sacrifice your fear for heights or your need for cheap thrill of screaming decibels at ultimatum height if you are sure you cant close ur mouths. Cos seriously i had my fair share of saliva in ur mouth already.
Supa dupa gross.
God noes what species of bacterium thrived in that splat of saliva on my arm that day.
|
|
<$BlogDateHeader$>
Baked a storm on Thursday. Heh, not exactly a storm but sugee cookies and a rainbow marble cake for Hari Raya Haji. Weeepeeedeeedokadoiingz! ;)
Sugee cookies
Rainbow marble cake : this i made in collaboration wif my mum
That will be all there is to my Hari Raya Haji, wif the customary chaperons; maybe chicken kurma or chicken rendang and briyani. Tho theres nothing much really other than the savours, still that makes me a jubilant one :)
This next installment will spell of how unscrupulous shenanigans can wring your biggy big pockets dry out of the downtrodden, literally.
Application form read : We will be responsible for looking for clients for our
models.
Guy : Btw, we are different from those agencies in HDB who are
more often than not are in desperate need for models, thus, they will scout desperately for models without any projects at hand. For us, we liaise wif considerably large corporations who will book us for projects and then scout for new faces or take on available existing models.
Me to myself : Ahuhh. So much for calling other agencies desperate. Urs aint any better. What was all the "Our agency is looking for faces to be in Singtel's upcoming commercial" about when nothin bt it was even mentioned during the introductory rite of theirs or watevr. Reeks of desperado mucho to moi, using that tactic as a booby trap.
And here i am foolhardy to think that they picked us out of simple random selection on that morning at fine and dandy orchard rd and i'll get to be one of those everyday faces in a colossal montage of Singaporeans who subscribe to Singtel (tho ironically im not) as concession to a less soporific holiday.
From this holiday so dreary that i could just peel my skin ( u noe skin that gets soaked in water and swells a whitish fold, oooh i love to peel em') sore and dry, like plucking fur off a Persian cat?
So dreary that i could just walk the length of Orchard Road wif a getup which looked like i just rammed into a Roman candle. LOL check out this linkie kali babas : http://www.asylum.com/gallery/the-weirdest-victorias-secret-outfits-we-found/521620/
and count all those whose heads spin wif jawgaping disbelief. Yea im highstrung. Hah.
Guy : you noe both of you have one thing in common. u noe wat?
me and fren : err. No.
Guy : You are both young. Clients prefer young faces. So after all that, dun u want to noe how much u'll have to pay for the portfolio? (there were other bouts he was tellin us bt they just trailed off into a lull voice in my cerebral at tt point)
me and fren : *we gave the wth look at each other*
fren : so.....what now we have to pay this lump sum of 680 for 5 outfits photography like now itself?...
Guy : you may bt i understand ur students and wun be able to pay now but u can cash in deposit or alternatively u can pay the full amt another day bt im afraid by then our ready clients will not be looking for models anymore.
me : * here- he- goes-yada-yada-subdued interest look*
Guy : you can also look at 3 outfits which will go at 480 buckeroos.
fren : ok watevr it is i can only confirm in 2 wks time
me : for me tt amount will only be attainable like by end jan 2009? (in my hart, yae as if, you can bid ur 480 buckeroos bon voyage...rather splurge it on an ipod)
soon, we treaded out of the agency.
The punchline is anyone can be models these days esp wif those bulging faux leather wallets to boot. This industry in Singapore as i see it is deluded. U dun pay 480 buckeroos to clinch a bank job do you? so why does tis has to be any different? Just for tt effing portfolio that they will do up nice nice sui sui for you. Little tt u noe u might look worse than you already are. what if they make you look like this mentel gundu here? HAHA
or even if you dont, what are the odds of even appearing as endearing to these clients so that they will partake you for their projects? and get future projects? you wouldnt wana stop at one.
If thats the case, forking 480 as investment (as the guy puts it) will make for loss on our side. Its not like i blardy care but wat abt those passionate and hard-up for modeling?
I mean cant these people just cover the costs of creating our portfolios and then just reap their due and deserved amt from the projects itself? Since its ur responsibility to find clients for every face then it shudnt be a problem for them to keep projects and moolah coming rite? As in it will be of duty for them to find the means possible in their stride to keep them coming? As of now watever this agency and all those in the cahoots are doing seem like they are just falling on the game of heads-and-tail of which of those whose entrance will send blue and orange notes whizzing in their faces. just my fifteen cents worth not trying to rough people up the wrong way but blogging is just the economy of speaking my mind for me :) PEACE.
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when unlike poles repel and mr maslow was all wrong
close your mouth mr hippotamus
buying youth?
here comes nothing.first SHIT : I MISSED LIFEHOUSE...
at this juncture, im young no more.my oh my, what ...
oooh...my blog's getting too wordy. i think i shou...
How much longer do i have to wait for greater thin...
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shes wishing she could just be those sliver of stars that will embrace the skies and shine the dulls of the night
shes wishing she could obliterate the memories bad and fugly
shes wishing she could be the one to throw the universe off kilter
shes wishing she could be the lover that drank every word and gesture and hold on to intensity long enuff
Adopted Trees.
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